Ristretto | Rob, Todd, and Mark Create Unreal Coffee Worlds Ep. 15
Mike invited Mark, Todd, and Rob into the studio without telling them why and we played a game we call Unreal Coffee World Draft. They were asked six questions, some open ended and some closed and with each question our participants were forced to draft an answer and create an unreal coffee world. Then the Covoya team voted on which unreal coffee world they would choose if they had to live in one.
Create your own Unreal Coffee World with these questions:
- In your coffee world, only one coffee beverage type exists. How do they make and drink coffee in your fantasy coffee world?
- Espresso - just espresso and water. No other ingredients allowed during preparation.
- Espresso and milk - drinks can include anything but they must include both espresso and milk everytime they are prepared.
- Hot black coffee - all coffee is black drip coffee of some sort, no additives or any kind ever.
- Hot coffee (additives optional) - all coffee is black drip but drinkers have the option of adding a sweetener or whitener.
- All cold coffee black, all of the time - preparation method doesn't matter but all coffee must be consumed black and cold.
- All cold coffee, all of the time (additives optional) - preparation method doesn't matter but all coffee must be consumed cold and drinkers have the option of adding a sweetener or whitener.
- In your coffee world, all coffee comes from just three countries. What are those countries?
- In your coffee world, how is coffee (at all times and in all places) packaged?
- Whole Bean - all coffee without exception is whole bean coffee until moments before it is brewed.
- Ground - all coffee without exception is ground coffee. It is impossible for whole bean coffee to leave a coffee roasting facility.
- Both - just like our current reality.
- Ok, we all know these are countless variations on coffee processing but what baseline processing method is the only one available in your coffee world?
- Fruit Dried (Natural) - in your coffee world all coffee is dried as full fruit.
- Parchment Dried (Washed) - in your coffee world all coffee is dried as parchment.
- Mucilage Dried (Honey) - in your coffee world all coffee is dried as mucilage.
- If you could bring back something that doesn't exist today but has existed at any point in coffee history, what would it be? Answer in up to 5 words.
- You have one wish. It can be for anything on behalf of the coffee industry. If you could give anything back to the coffee industry, what would it be? Answer in up to 5 words.
Here are Mark, Rob and Todd's coffee worlds:
Mark Inman's Coffee World
All coffee served in this world is espresso. You don’t have any other choices. It’s a shot of espresso or an Americano or nothing at all. No, you can’t add anything to it. And guess what? All that espresso is made with some combination of Brazil, Rwanda, and Ethiopia. Every espresso you drink is either a Brazilian, a Rwanda, an Ethiopia, or some combination of those coffees because in this world those are the only coffee origins that exist. In this world, coffee comes packaged as either whole bean coffee or ground coffee. And, for what it’s worth, as far as processing goes, all coffee in this world is dried in parchment. Interestingly, in this world, coffee isn’t traded electronically over the internet. Coffee is traded in person in open-pit trading, known as “open-outcry” trading, which hasn’t happened in the real world in well over 20 years. Finally, in this coffee world there are formal educational pathways for coffee careers where you can even earn degrees.
Rob Stephen's Coffee World
All coffee served in this world is hot black coffee and you can’t add anything to it. It’s hot. It’s black. End of story. It might help to know that all that hot black coffee is made with some combination of Kenya, Indonesia, and Mexico. Every coffee you drink is either Kenyan, Rwandan, from Mexico, or some combination of those coffees because in this world those are the only coffee origins that exist. In this world, all coffee comes packaged as whole bean coffee. And, for what it’s worth, as far as processing goes, all coffee in this world is fruit dried. Perhaps some good news, in this world old style apprenticeships are common in the coffee world and Zimbabwe 053 coffee is easily sourced. Finally, to end on a high note, get this: In this coffee world, coffee NEVER goes stale.
Todd Mackey's Coffee World
All coffee served in this world is hot black coffee, but in this world you have the option to add sweeteners and whiteners (i.e. cream and sugar, for example). It might help to know that all that hot black coffee to which you might add stuff is made with some combination of Colombia, Guatemala, and Honduras. Every coffee you drink is either Colombian, Guatemalan, Honduran, or some combination of those coffees because in this world those are the only coffee origins that exist. In this world, all coffee comes packaged as ground coffee. No exception. And, for what it’s worth, as far as processing goes, all coffee in this world is mucilage dried, even the Ethiopian Long Berry Harrar which, in this world, has been said to be easily sourced, which is odd and you might question since the only coffee origins that exist in this world are Colombia, Guatemala, and Honduras. In any case, incongruencies are not going to bother you much because in this coffee world there is prosperity and hope for a future.
August 10, 2026
37 view(s)
37 view(s)
